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Questions for Cathy #11: Why Do High Profile Women Stay with A Cheater?

We’ve all seen infidelity scandals in the headlines. High profile people fall by the wayside just like normal folk; infidelity, the great equalizer. Mr. Anthony Weiner for example: (such an unfortunate name, although he does take it seriously) has proven yet again, that he’s having a very difficult time keeping his urges in check. His wife left him this round, but what about the wives who stay? Women of great means and brains? I was asked this question by a curious woman. So, I consulted the ever knowledgeable Cathy Chambliss.

I posed the question:

Why do high profile women stay with men who cheat?

Cathy:

Sometimes high profile couples stay together when there is infidelity because there is so much to lose by splitting up; financial stability or children can be affected. If the woman is in politics, she may not want her image to be affected by being divorced. Some couples are already merely co-parenting in a house and are not sexual or emotionally intimate anymore, so, even though infidelity is still painful because it involves lying, the high profile wife may have already disconnected from her spouse and is only there for the kids or her career. Also, all couples can work through infidelity with effective couple’s counseling. However, if there is repetitive cheating, it is very hard to make progress.

***

The answer seems somewhat obvious and “simple”, but the difficulties that infidelity brings, are not. If one chooses to stay, that doesn’t mean the issue has been resolved. The after affects of not dealing with a betrayal can be just as devastating as the infidelity itself. It’s very important to seek help in every instance. You can’t know, what you don’t know–this I do know.

*(Cathy Chambliss, LMFT can be contacted at: 310-303-9132)

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